When shit happens it happens all at once. When it’s good it’s great, and when it sucks……well that’s now. Too much shit that can overwhelm a person. What to do? It’s a pain in the ass when I can’t control shit. I love being in control, I prefer it, it’s who I am/part of me. I don’t like depending on other people. I am a solitary person, I take care of myself. If I can’t do it myself when then I go to the people I know and trust to help me.

Haha thoughts, meanings, and quotes all take on a new meaning once they hit closer to home. Yeah I know I crashed my truck today, and I should take it personally, but I’m not. In the long run my accident put me in a better mood (minus the whiplash I am feeling as the night progresses). Like a dinner, we were discussing how much more fun it would have been if the other guy had known about Dane Cook. We both got out “do u have a pen? Can you remember my shit???” or “can u fix this right now? ‘cause that wasn’t like that a minute ago”…..and so on. I’m sitting there laughing knowing that it would have been lot more fun. Before the accident I was pissed or sad or depressed or something. But afterward, I was laughing. Not that I had been in an accident, but at how much I love my truck and how stubborn it is, much like it’s owner. A lil while after everything had settled down I went back out to “asses the situation” and I realized nothing that bad actually happened, I bolted the headlight back on (the light bulbs still worked) and brought the plastic parts in to warm up. Some glue, a few new bolts, and a few hammer blows later, it’ll be fine. You may laugh, but that’s all it’ll take. That’s y I love that truck and refuse to get rid of it. The thing is so simple, like me. And besides as long as it’s still dependable, y should I get a new vehicle anyways?

As far as the shit I was dealing with earlier in the day. Well I guess only time will show how it’s gonna play out, “it’s gonna be fun” I just wish it wasn’t always with feelings like it normally is, but I suppose like always “shit ‘ll buff out.” And plus the accident took my mind off it. The only downside, $500 I get to pay the insurance company on top of the monthly payments I already give them too fucking much.

So in the long run, everything happens for a reason. The accident put me in a better mood…… haha I guess I really am crazy, or at least not normal, the average person would be more depressed about the accident, but I get happier….oh well, I’ll slide that in with the eating an ice cream cone outside on moday during the blizzard. Yeah, I’m nutz. But I wouldn’t have it any other way. If I hadn’t met every person (good and bad) I have met, said and felt everything I have, and done everything thing (good, stupid, dangerous, funny, or what ever) that I have done, then I wouldn’t be the person I am today.

But for now, I sure as hell could use a neck rub to nurse the whiplash….. and maybe a hot lady friend to curl up with….

As we grow up, we learn that even the one person that wasn't supposed to ever let you down probably will. You will have your heart broken, probably more than once, and it's harder every time. You'll break hearts, so remember how it felt when yours was broken. You'll fight with your best friend. You'll blame a new love for things an old one did. You'll cry because time is passing so fast. You'll eventually lose someone you love. So take too many pictures, laugh too hard, and love like you've never been hurt because every minute you spend mad or upset is a minute of happiness that you'll never get back

"You'll blame a new love for things an old one did" is the one part that sticks out in that. stop fucking doing it

Ask me a question, I'll tell you the truth....about anything

Don't ask, i won't tell

What's so hard to understand?

So here I sit, in my dorm room, in clothes worn 3, going on 4 days straight. In socks still soaking wet from the swamp I went walking thru this afternoon. Ripped pants, beat up shirts and enjoying it all to no end, with no real urge to change or shower anytime soon.  

Thus I have been thinking, as I have been all weekend long. I love the woods, I love everything about it. But what makes a true hunter? Getting a deer? Sitting in a tree? Shooting and missing a deer? There can be many answers to this question. I personally believe that myself, my father, my grand father, and my cousin are true hunters. We all spent 3 days (some 4 days) in the woods, no showers, no bathrooms (except all of the outdoors) sleeping in an old RV and living in the trees. None of saw a single deer, much less got a shot at one. And yet, none of us were sad, none of us supremely disappointed. And yet, all of us had great deals of fun. Me personally, I never have more fun than hunting.

Why must it end? I wish I could live in the woods, never leaving. I love it, the solidarity, the views, the simple pleasures. I would love to live off the land, I can think of no greater joy in life….. except maybe the birth of my first born child. But that is years away. For now, I just want some land to call my own. Something that is mine, not my dad’s, my mom’s, my grandpa’s, or my friend’s but mine. I am responsible for it. All I want is some real estate. Yeah I know it’s weird, a 19 year old kid talking about buying land, but I am me, I learned from those ahead of me. I know I can make money just by buying land. And while I make money, I can just go to that land and sit there. Twiddling my thumbs, all by myself, doing what ever I want. First thing, shoot a 5 gal tank of gas with a flaming arrow. Second, put up a little one room shack, and start hunting. Going day after day, not really caring if I actually get anything, but enjoying life to the fullest, being a true hunter. So that’s my plan, as soon as I buy that land, that’s where I’ll be, if u can’t find me, I’ll be there. Out in nature.

Now it is about 9:00, time for bed (I’m no in the habit of that because of this weekend hunting) and maybe a shower tomorrow morning, maybe not…. I don’t smell that bad so I should be ok for a few more days. But yeah, I’ve never been happier, the only problem is, that I am like this for just one week out of the year, I wish it was longer.

You know it just struck me, why would I write such an entry here. No one here is a “True Hunter,” so it is more than likely beyond any of you what I just wrote. You all are thinking, “what the hell??? He likes sitting in a tree smelling like deer piss?” and yeah, I do, I find nothing better in life. Oh well, I’ll just chalk this up to a personal entry and not even bother reading any possible replys.

            I WILL NEVER BLAME ALCOHOL FOR ANY OF MY ACTIONS, anything I personally do while consuming alcohol, I will accept the consequences for. BUT, I will not do anything with a girl who is totally trashed, so it comes to that, don’t take offense if I say no, it just means I am waiting till I am sober to talk to you, and find out what you really want.

            SO, when you are sober, talk to me honestly, no bullshitting, tell me what you want, and I will tell you what I want. End of story. I am who I am. I don’t feel it is right to take advantage of girls while they are intoxicated (not to mention my best friends would skin me alive if I did). But when I am intoxicated, who cares, I know my limits and I never reach them now that I know them. So if I do something, then I did something. I won’t blame anything/anyone but myself. Other than that, do what you want. See what I do.

            I hate bullshit, I hate drama. I dislike anyone who isn’t truthful. I am a simple man, be honest to me and I will be honest to you. Don’t create drama with me. I don’t like it, I get myself out of it. Most of you now I am easy going, I let most stuff slide. But there are certain things that piss me off. If you find one of the things don’t push it, cause I will get pissed.

            Drama is a fact of life, I keep the drama out of my life so I can help my friends thru theirs. So, if you are in trouble with someone/something and you can’t solve it by yourself. Find me. I’ll get you out. Just don’t ask me how I do/did, because you don’t want to know, just know I will get you out of it.

            I said it b4, I’m saying it again. Guys should never take advantage of girls. If you try to, then run, because I will be behind you. Making sure you won’t ever do it again.